Walking into the room to find your child on the counter…
You walk into the kitchen to discover your four year old on the countertop climbing to reach the tallest shelf to get the Halloween candy. Does this sound familiar? Or can you relate to a familiar situation? I can totally feel where you are coming from on this frustration as a parent! But the questions that arise are “Is he purposely disobeying my warnings and is just doing what he wants?” Well, the good news is, not necessarily!
At this young age, kids are still learning to think before they act. Self-regulation is a very vital skill set known as the Executive function. This is what keeps you from blurting out every thought in your head! Which I am sure you’re thinking of someone you know right now that might still have this issue as an adult! Haha
This skill set is what keeps you from touching a hot stove or yelling at someone at work when you get angry or in your little person’s case making a beeline straight for the candy they have been eyeing for the past 30 minutes and climbing to anything in their path to get to it even thought it’s and unsafe expedition. At that moment in time their impulse to act on their sugar indulgence is so strong in comparison to all your safety warnings. The main thing your child knew that was certain was he wanted candy! Not later but like, right now!
Encouraging and promoting your child’s self-regulation skill set is extremely important for your child’s future social relationships, emotional development and classroom learning.
Waiting for a turn, for example, will be an expectation both in school and in life. If your child is in a situation where another friend won’t share a toy, your child will need to show self-regulation in order to stop, think, and respond appropriately.
That’s why it’s so important to give your child chances to practice self-regulation every day! Which of course to accomplish this it will require a lot of patience! Here are several fun activities you can do at home to help your child practice self-control:
Freeze Dance
Not only does your little mover and shaker have the chance to get all their wiggles out in these games, they also has to stop their movements upon demand, which helps develop their brain’s ability to control impulses.
Just turn on some music and dance very fast, then very slow, then back to fast, and turn it off completely every so often—and ask your child to freeze in position when the music turns off.
Mindful breathing.
When your child gets stressed out and can’t control his emotions, mindful breathing is the way to go—just being aware of their own breaths can help them feel calmer and more relaxed. Help them focus on his breaths with some pretend activities such as Smell a flower by breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth, or breathe like a bunny by taking in three quick sniffs through the nose and letting out one long exhale through the nose.
Store bought Games.
Simple games can help your child practice the art of waiting her turn. Games like Ker Plunk and Don’t Break the Ice are great beginning board games.
Just remember to keep encouraging your little one to stop and think! Patience is key when you are dealing with young children who are in the middle of developing this very important self-regulation skill set! Practice these skills with being creative and playing some fun games and activities that requires your child to stop and think before reacting!